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Babies

So my cousin Mandy is expecting a baby, and my cousin Mario’s girlfriend is also pregnant. This makes my mom officially the last in our family to become a grandmother since neither me nor my two sisters are pregnant and have no immediate plans.


So now every time I see my family, they want to talk babies. Especially my mom. It doesn’t seem to phase her that, you know, Kim and I don’t have all the required equipment to just go into the bedroom and make a child. All that matters is that I’m 26 now, Kim and I live on our own, so why not? I guess it’s a Mexican culture thing. But also, it’s easier for my straight cousins to get pregnant. They don’t really even need to have a plan for it, which they didn’t. It’s not like I can wake up one day and be “accidentally” preggo.


Me: Well we need to get married first.
Mom: Your cousins aren’t married.
Me: Well we need to save some money first for sure.
Mom: You make more money than both your cousins.
Me: We want a house first. There’s no room for babies in our apartment.
Mom: A crib doesn’t take much space. You have two stories. Your cousins still live at home.
Me: Well we need to find a doctor and everything first. It takes a lot of time and planning for lesbians. Plus money. Lots of money. And lots of attempts. Each attempt costs money.
Mom: You have health insurance. Lots more is covered than you think.


Ugh.


I’m pretty sure my mom—well…. Maybe not. But I HOPE my mom is realistic enough to not REALISTICALLY expect grandchildren for at least a few more years. There’s just no way. There’s NO WAY. I love kids. Kim loves kids. We’re all the kids’ favorite aunts and most people tell us that we are really good with kids. We both have talked about kids, but we also said we don’t want them until we’re married, with a house and spare rooms, and financially prepared. We both don’t want our kids to grow up poor like we did. We don’t want to rely on our parents for help or at least not a LOT of help, like we see my cousins doing, and her sisters doing all the time. But it’s hard to say these things to your family without it coming off as “we don’t want our kids to have a shit childhood” which sounds like “we had a shit childhood’ or “your kids have a shit childhood.”


No, I don’t expect to be able to buy a pony for my kids if they wanted it. And I don’t want my kids to be spoiled brats. But we both agree we don’t want to ever worry about affording food for our kids, or not affording clothes… moving to shit neighborhoods because it’s all we can afford, or squeezing a family of four into a 1 or 2 bedroom. And most importantly, I want to be able to be there for my kids. Like, physically present, and not off working all the time. We can barely afford living on our own as it is. And that’s just cause I can work 12-14 hour work days. I need a better job, with better pay and to somehow earn it within a decent 7-8 hour work day. And until I really perfect my grooming skills and gain a larger clientele… that’s not happening.


So yeah. Basically, I’m not ready for kids. But in my family, kids aren’t usually planned, lol. So I guess my family isn’t used to waiting this long. They keep reminding us we’ve been together for almost five years and that it’s “plenty of time.” So it’s weird. Thank god, lesbians can’t have unexpected pregnancies. I’m pretty sure my mom and aunties would be sabotaging any sort of birth control I would otherwise be taking lol.


It’s funny to remember just a couple years ago, my mother hated Kim. Now she won’t shut up about how she hopes her grandchildren have her eyes, and even more amazing and perfect would be if we had a little boy who could sing like her. Nothing makes my mom happier than the idea of having a possible Elvis Presley- reincarnation grandson baby. She’s already aware of my habit of getting my hands on babies and styling their hair into pompadours. I just think they look so cute on toddlers, especially when you give them oversized sunglasses to pair. I DON’T KNOW WHY IT’S SO CUTE.


I remind my mom she does have grandchildren. Our dog, and daughter, Fable, 4 years old. And our cat, and son, Ouija, 13 months. My mom has disowned her snake-grandchildren. Oh yeah, and She-She the spider. But yeah. See. Plenty of kids.

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